Friday, February 17, 2012

Why Do We Suffer?

Recently, I was listening to a talk show on the radio, at least, I think it was on the radio, and they were talking about "Why we choose to suffer." I took notes on the talk and if I remember who I was listening to, I will add it to my blog. But, for now, I do want to write about the idea of suffering since many people seek out therapy to end suffering.  For instance, a relationship is causing you pain, a job turns out to be a disappointment, you feel stuck and unhappy with your life or some other experience is causing you to suffer. In life, we want to avoid suffering and pain and we want to embrace pleasure and happiness...no doubt about it, if you had to choose, most likely it would be the pleasure chest! So, is suffering a choice we make, just like sadness, anger, frustration, joy, etc., or is it an unavoidable experience of being human?

Lets say, suffering is unavoidable, then what?  Well here's where the talk got interesting. What can we learn about ourselves during times of suffering? It is a perfect time to learn to have compassion for ourselves, especially for people who have a difficult time being kind and gentle t with themselves. Suffering can have us feeling incredibly alone and aloneness triggers all kinds of feelings for most people. I'm a big believer in the idea of curiosity....being curious about ourselves, our reactions, our triggers and our feelings can lead us down a road to a greater sense of awareness about ourselves. What would happen if you actually sat with suffering as though it were something you could hold in your hands? OK, so here is where the creativity comes in.  Imagine when you are in a place of suffering that you are holding it in your hands, looking at it, feeling it, and smelling it. What color is it? What shape, texture, size, smell and other characteristic does it take on? If you drew it, how much of the page would it take up? Would it be jagged, smooth, or sharp? You might also explore where in your body you experience your suffering? Get to know your suffering? What triggers it? Loss might be one instigator. Move close to your suffering. Take care of it. Get to know it, respect it and have compassion for it. This way, when it does surface, you do not have to fear it or allow it to scare you; you can be with it and walk beside it.

Until next time...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

The ArT of Journaling - Rant and Rave to Your Heart's Content!


So, someone gave you a brand new leather bound, or simple journal as a gift, and you're not sure what to do with it or where to begin. Chances are, it might still be sitting on your dining room table or nightstand just waiting to be embellished with your thoughts and feelings. Or, maybe you stare onto the blank pages uncertain of what to write, draw or what warrants a journal entry. I'm here to help.

Here we go...You can write whatever you want in your journal as long as you have a safe place to keep it where family members or room mates won't pry into your sacred psyche.  You can also draw, collage, paint and glue things such as movie tickets, a dried flower, horoscope or anything that holds significance for you. A journal is your personal, creative playground that does not adhere to any guidelines or rules.  Journals are a creative tool to get to know yourself better and to develop deeper clarity of your thoughts and feelings as they are reflected back to you.

I have been journaling for years. My mother kept a journal and used it as a recount of the days activities and her thoughts. My entries are much more personal than my mother's, including my disappointments, my accomplishments, and my attempt to de-tangle my musings, which at times have me confused and in need of some clarity. I also glue poems that touch me, horoscopes that act as guides to my clairvoyant side, and I draw out my dilemmas and feelings.

It doesn't matter what time of day you journal: morning, noon, or night.  If you find staring at a blank page intimidating, I suggest you begin with an opening line that helps get you going, such as, Today I... Or, Here I am, once again, not knowing what to write in my journal, but, if I were to choose one thing that mattered to me today, it would be... I believe journals are meant to be a sounding board for us to share and express aspects of our lives that we may or may not want to share with others. A safe place where censoring is optional; grammar and spelling are optional. And, freedom to be yourself is recommended!

So, go find that new journal, curl up in your favorite spot, pour yourself your favorite beverage, open to the first delicious page and brag, boast, cry, reflect, brainstorm, and rant away!

Peace,
Victoria



Wednesday, January 11, 2012

VISION BOARDs - YOUR PERSONAL ROADMAP FOR 2012

During the first few weeks of the New Year, we are inundated with news of dieting offers, gym bargains, car deals and for those among us who are self-growth-ers....VISION BOARDS.  I happen to love vision boards and have made many of them over the years usually using collage. I don't always wait for a new year to make one; you can create a vision board anytime during the year but, the New Year does provide an official starting point to map out your intentions, wishes, expectations of the year ahead and create a visual reminder of your personal landscape dreams.  Basically, you are sending yourself and the universe a snapshot of what you would like to bring into your life for the coming year. They're easy, fun, creative, focused, and simple to make.
What do you need? Very simple:
  • Quiet moment alone or with a friend.
  • Light a candle
  • Add calming music if you wish
  • And make your favorite drink....
  • Collage magazine cut-out images or photos
  • Glue Sticks
  • Scissors
  • Heavy paper or a board
Choose images that reflect the changes, letting go-of's, wishes, and vision you have for your life for the year. In other words, what you would like to manifest in your life.  You can choose to have a theme, such as LOVE, career, relationships, health,  etc. Or, you can combine them for one big intention. You can tear or cut your images and clue them to the paper or board.  Overlapping, separating or any other unique method you choose. You can make your vision board as big or small as you wish. You can also cut out says to add and if you wish, use colored pencils or pastels or markers to color in the blank space...totally optional.  Hang your vision board somewhere where you will be reminded of your vision and reflect on it daily, weekly, monthly, however often you wish. You can also add journal entries about your vision board and how your New Year's intentions are manifesting.

Most of all....have fun!
Peace, Victoria