WHAT KEEPS YOU CENTERED?

I had a flash of gratitude today while I was standing outside the Honey Baked Ham store amidst the crowd of  focused shoppers. As I stood there, waiting for my friend to finish her shopping, I realized how fortunate I am and all I have to be thankful for in 2011. Let me just say, I've had years where it has felt like like I had all I could do to keeping my head above water.  But this year, I got to the finishing line of  being a licensed marriage and family therapist. That in and of its self has me grateful ten times over.  Writing a list of what one is grateful for is definitely an inspiring activity and a reminder of what gifts you've received throughout the last 12 months. And, I recommend everyone do it as a centering activity. Even if you are going through one of your more challenging of years, find one thing that you feel grateful for.  Anyway, this is not a posting about all that I have to be thankful for, though I could easily write many pages on this  subject, I want to help you gear up for the days and nights ahead by finding a practice that has you centered.  I want to suggest ways in which you can keep your wits about you, experience peace amongst the insanity, discover love in unlikely places, and most of all, trust in yourself when you might be swayed to doubt.

So, where do you find centering?  Do you have a meditation practice? Do you have a creative outlet? Do you make tine to walk in nature? When was the last time you went outside and counted the many different species of birds you saw? When was the last time you allowed yourself space to draw or paint a mandala?  Are there books you've been wanting to read?  If you are reading this and wondering just how and when you are going to fit any of this into your busy schedule, have you thought about asking your family to give you the gift of time this year? Do you trust someone else to take over while you take a break? Or do you feel you are the only one to keep the household functioning? I invite you take care of yourself this holiday and ask for what you need. Dear Santa, may I please have 12 hours once a week, once a month, or (you fill in the blank) to myself this year?


How do you know when your are centered? I invite you to get creative and one way is to begin by writing a gratitude list. You can also get creative and make a gratitude collage with images cut from magazines that reflect all that you are grateful this year. You might also want to create a centering collage or mandala that reflects calm in your life. Fill it with images that relax you and provide a sense of peace for you. Hang it some place in your home or office so you will be reminded of its power. See my other posts for information on how to create mandalas. 


No matter where you find centering, stay in the here and now...not in the past and not in the future, there you will only find anxiety. If you stay in the moment, may calm and centering be with you.

Getting a head start on the holiday blues

This is one of my first postings on the holidays that are looming ahead like a storm over the horizon. I personally find this time of year emotionally pack-filled.  For some, they zoom by without a flicker like a racehorse galloping around a track.  Maybe, you leave town and check into a fine ski resort with only the snowfall to worry about. Maybe, you have to choose who you are going to spend the holidays with and who you might have to disappoint. For many, the holidays bring on a shift in mood, stress, expectations, expense and an abundance of tasty temptations. How do we remain in control or at least behind the wheel of our emotions during this energy-packed time of year? How do we acknowledge feelings and emotions that can surface without a clue where they came from while not falling into a deep depressive state? I believe being prepared is one way. Nurturing ourselves and our feelings is another. Not running from our emotions and allowing them to be felt is an important tool to respecting and having a deeper understanding of ourselves.

One thing to remember, is there does not have to be one event or disappointment to create the "gray cloud" effect. Sometimes, a shift in one's mood can occur like a drop in temperature.  Holidays can and are a reminder of the past. Memories can be triggered; expectations can run wild setting us up for a downward spiral. It is important to know how to take care of yourself in times like this. Journalling is a great way to put your feelings to paper. Art is another even if you don't consider yourself an artist. Try collage, it is a non-threatening creative medium. Make a list now of all the things you've been wanting to accomplish and haven't gotten around to, such as clearing out closets, organizing your home, getting together with a friend you haven't seen in a while. Most of all, take care of your feelings. Don't try to push them away. Feel them. Write about them, Paint or collage about them.

That's it for now...more to come.

The holidays are coming, the holidays are coming...

Collage Greeting Card

 It begins in November and December, those months where we can be swept away by expectations, spending and mood shifts that can occur  as often as the temperatures outside change.  Mood shifts can come over us like a dark cloud from out of nowhere. Nothing drastic happened, just suddenly, there we are, overcome with sadness, holiday blues, anxiety or some other state that has cast its spell on us. My intention here is to let you know it is not unusual to feel this way during this time of year. The dark days of winter are upon us along with the craziness of the holidays.

OK, so what can you do to make it through to the other side of the new year?  Here are a few tips I've learned along the way about getting through the holidays with my spirit intact.

• Plan ahead - have some creative projects in line to work on to focus your attention. Collage, draw, or paint MANDALAS.
• Journal - give yourself the gift of a beautiful journal
• We can learn a lot about ourselves in the dark days as well as light. Be curious about your moods and write about them. Let the page hold them.
• Move your body - walk, take a yoga class, offer to walk dogs at a shelter.
• Volunteer
• Reach out to friends
• Read 
• If aloneness triggers feelings, don't push them away, be with the feelings and realize they are coming up to be healed not ignored.
• Feelings pass
• Reach out to friends
• Make your holiday cards using collage or some other creative tool.
• Attend a spiritual celebration

Collage Mandala

So, here you have a few tips and tools to help you manage the possible emotional effects the holidays can bring on. I think we forget that we can use this time creatively. To explore creative practices that during the rest of the year, we might not have time for. Think outside the box.
These do not have to be the dark emotional days, but rather, the awakening days of the spirit and creative energy that resides inside of us.

Peace,
Victoria

Making your way through the holidays with creativity

They're back...arriving each year without failure at the same time. They leap upon us like a tiger leaping on its pray. And you know that before you even digest your Thanksgiving meal you're thrust into the holiday madness. With this madness comes spending, giving, receiving, colds, expectations, sugar, stress, invites, aloneness, pressure and the list goes on. It's difficult to not get caught up in the change of energy the holidays bring. Every year, I try to take a step back and just observe, but at some point, usually the day before Christmas, the guild sets in and I dash to the closest shopping center to pick a few gifts up. Each year, I write in my journal that this year is going to be different. I will give from my heart; I will give of my time; I will give only if I wish to. I'm even feeling this way as I write in my blog. The question always becomes to give or not to give? But this piece is not about whether to give or not to give, it is about taking care of yourself artfully during the holidays. It is about if you feel the holiday blues beginning to sneak in, how can you care for yourself during the dark periods that can emerge like a winter chill. As I like to say, when in doubt, create! For me that means, draw, knit, write, bake, work in my garden, make my holiday cards, journal, rearrange my home, expose myself to creativity around the city and finally, to read. I read and I discover ideas. For each of us our creativity is a personal process. It is something that sparks your soul. Something that is a reflection of you. It does not have to be about perfection unless maybe you are painting your home, and even then a little mistake here and then will not be noticed.

So what is it for you that is the voice of your soul? What is that makes you feel alive? Without worrying about being good at it, what is it you would like to try? Make a creativity wish list and don't worry if you've been naught or nice, just go for it. Ask the critics to leave the room and toss the "shoulds" out the window and allow yourself to play. A walk around Micheal's craft store is sure to spark some ideas. Buy a canvas and some paints and explore. Create a mandala. Walk around your neighborhood and take some photos. Take some magazines and cut out images and make a vision collage of what you wish for in 2010. Make an altered book. Check out a knitting store. If you are interested in support or more ideas, please write me at sealoverv@aol.com. Most of all, have fun and allow mistakes, if there are such a thing